Courtesy of Diary of a Roller Girl…
There ۪s nothing else to do in [enter your city name here] _ For a nominal monthly fee you are guaranteed something to do two nights a week.
Life ۪s better on quads _ Sure, some refs wear inline skates. But why would you when you can wear what the skaters wear?
Rollercon, Bootcamps and travel bouts _ Need an excuse to go to Vegas? You have one now. You ۪ll be invited to Vegas next July to party with thousands of other derby girls and refs _ and learn stuff too. Plus there are Bootcamp training weekends where North America ۪s best skaters, refs and coaches will school you on all that is derby. Plus invitational scrimmages where you can play with some of America ۪s best skaters.
Who needs a gym? You get to train twice a week with us. Nothing motivates you more than gals in short shorts screaming at you to skate faster. And you WILL sweat.
Weight loss/gain _ If you ۪re a big guy or gal, you can drop at least 20 lbs. If you ۪re a little guy or gal, you will gain it all in muscle _ In your ass and thighs. You get to pick a derby name _ Creating your on-track persona is super fun!
You can design your ref outfit _ As long as it ۪s black and white and stripey, you ۪re good to go. Refs can customize a cute outfit! Or, if you ۪re a dude, you can make it badass. So go ahead and really create your alter ego.
You get to be in the spotlight _ Being on the track during a bout with the crowd cheering does the adrenaline and ego good.
You get to watch girls in fishnets skate around _ Let ۪s be honest, if the only reason you ۪re signing up is to find a hot date, go elsewhere. But if you can appreciate the athleticism it takes for this sport, come on over.
You get to boss girls around _ Whether you were a know-it-all as a kid on the playground or a shy-guy who never came out from behind your Atari, derby girls will look to you for knowledge, guidance and advice on how to improve their game. And you get to tell them what to do. If you ۪re already brimming with ego, you can come too, but we ۪ll knock you on your behind if you get out of line.
Melting pot of awesomeness _ Roller derby is for big girls, little girls, jock girls, girls who have never played a team sport, girls with tattoos, girls without tattoos, girls who are gay, straight or bi, career girls, unemployed girls, students, mothers, grandmothers and aunts. Wherever you come from, you will be accepted. Check your intolerances at the door and hang with some pretty amazing people!
After-practice parties, after-bout parties, clean-your-bearings parties, theme parties _ Your social life will increase by ten-fold if you want it to. So will your resistance to alcohol. And we karaoke too!
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON!!! We need you _ In a bout there is a head ref, 2 jammer refs and at least 2 more skating with the pack. Plus there are non-skating positions like jam timers, penalty trackers and scorekeepers. The refs and support crew are part of the team and essential to every league! Got all that? Now let ۪s squash the negative nellies _ But I don ۪t know anything about roller derby. None of us knew much about derby either. You ۪ll be expected to study the rules outside of practice, but we ۪ll help you learn the rules through drills and scrimmaging! But I don ۪t know how to skate. If you can stand on quads, we ۪ll teach you how to move in them. But I don ۪t own skates. We have a growing collection of roller skates and safety gear we may be able to loan out until you get your own. But we won ۪t turn you away if you show up in inlines and a bike helmet and want to try out with us. Mandatory safety gear: knee pads, wrist guards, elbow pads, helmet. But I don ۪t have time. It ۪s true; you have to be committed if you want to ref. Right now we practice twice a week, 2-3 hours per day, and many of us skate additional time to stay conditioned and volunteer time on league committees. But if you ۪re looking for a new activity to throw yourself into, this is it. And we guarantee you, it ۪s addictive. Our girls are dedicated and will give it their all at practice. We won ۪t let you down. I not sure about reffing, but becoming a derby girl sounds pretty fun. Great! We want you as well! Get in touch! So there you have it! We want YOU! (Yes, you!) If you ۪re interested, check out our recruiting page. Hope to see you at the next recruitment meeting on January 22, 2012!
Written by Cherri Blaster, a member of the Lethbridge Roller Derby Guild whom skates with the Deathbridge Derby Dames. Follow her as she posts about training and the fun she has as she discovers more about derby. http://diaryofarollergirl.wordpress.com/